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Millennial Angel
Our homeowners’ association informed us that the termite inspection would be Friday. I opened the door to three uniformed men at the crack of dawn. There was the boss, a guy in his sixties, then a...
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The Food Thing
Do you know that there is a whole new movement going on called the Body Positive Movement? Where was this when I was nineteen and 98 pounds? I was listening to the The Home Podcast last night, and...
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The Head Shot
Do you find it almost impossible to explain everything that you do while holding a wine glass in one hand and a chicken skewer in another? Do you have three different business cards, five Facebook...
View ArticleThe Lady Shuffle
It says at the top of the page to “add media,” but I can’t because I dropped my phone in the toilet of the “ladies” room at Rusty’s Surf Ranch where Jay’s band the Weasels was playing last night. The...
View ArticleSame Hustle. Different Drugs.
The thing about your birthday is that it’s going to happen whether you learned anything the year before or not. So mine is happening. Right now. Today. At the start of my birthday month, I gave myself...
View ArticleTrump Freedom Rodeo
Trump Freedom Rodeo He’s that guy who says you’ve got thick thighs like that’s a bad thing. He’s that boss with the small hands and the big thumb on the button of your business. He’s the dad of...
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Slip Dress
Slip Dress My mother’s downstairs apartment hangs like a dress in her closet waiting for me to grow into it. I sleep in her bed to become her. I remember things she said about men and making them...
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Wife Beaters Are Called To Action
Donald Trump is inciting such a funky, creepy-ass class of people to vote. I didn’t even know the woodwork they’re coming out of was still made. The D is using his immigration platform to needle into a...
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Visiting Artist – Poet – W. Isaac Simons “Blood”
Blood in our veins has a pulse, a regular, regulated pulse. Which sustains us with its prudent responsibility. It’s with us our entire lives, from Faraway Farm childhood on the rock, to B of A...
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How to Talk to Men with Dogs
Handsome Boy You are walking one way, a cute man with a dog is walking the other. He can even be on the other side of the street. He is alone. Hmmm. The dog is cute too. You like dogs. “I love...
View ArticleTo My Republican Girlfriends – From Brook Dougherty
If you’re floundering around looking for a reason to choose Hillary, here’s what I think: Have you ever had a friend whose husband cheated on her? Did you ever go through countless hours with her as...
View ArticleFiring the Dragon Lady
Today I fired the dragon lady who has run my department of Woulda Coulda Shoulda since the day I dropped out of college in 1970. It was just before the holidays when I decided, based on a full six...
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Nick Melvoin – A Shard of Hope
I really thought I was done with ANYTHING to do with LAUSD. Then Nick Melvoin told me he was running for School Board, and a dart of hope came back to life inside me, like a leaf on a plant I thought...
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Philanthropy for Dogs
Would you like your dog to be so well fed, she’d be itch free, poop perfectly, have glowing ears and joints like butter? Do you want your dog to shriek, “My human loves me so much?” More importantly,...
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GET A WHIFF OF THAT
Stacy Johnson was doing her thing at the Pacific Palisades Chamber of Commerce mixer when I caught up with her. She was representing both her skincare business and her fragrance line, Bungalow. When...
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The Head Shot
Do you find it almost impossible to explain everything that you do while holding a wine glass in one hand and a chicken skewer in another? Do you have three different business cards, five Facebook...
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Big Girl Selling Pants
When you write and publish a memoir about your most stupid and embarrassing secret, a weird thing happens. Or at least it did to me. I didn’t do much to sell it except post it on my Facebook timeline....
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Skin Dollars Making Sense
Lots of facial treatments are expensive. Trust me, I know. But this one isn’t. Yes, the photo is hideous, I got that, but wanted you to see how thick and dense this clay is. This was bought at...
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The Home Office
Working in the Dog House by Brook Dougherty The decision to work at home is right up there with deciding to have another child. There’s never the right time, there’s never the right money, and like...
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Walk Like A Lobster
WALK LIKE A LOBSTER – Brook Dougherty WHAT IS A LOBSTER? A lobster, in network-marketing-speak, is a person who appears to be successful and confident and has a strong network. They are usually people...
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